Catching up

This is our catch up blog. When we moved from the old apartment to the new, we lost the easy access to the internet as the old place had a dial-up connection there. With the new place, we have a 15 minute walk up hill to the internet club. Graham and I are here now. Jen and Mike, this is the place you used; did they have the air conditioning on when you where here in Feb, because they have the heat on here now. We also have been to your pizza place and the AMCTOP (in Russian, this is actually pronounced Amstar; it confusd our driver when we kept asking to go to A.M.C. Top).

The Matthews are experiencing more than their share of challenges, but it is theirs to share. We will share some of the fun times we have spent with them here.

Late Wednesday night, Joe wrote up this portion of the blog on our laptop. Wendy reviewed and added her own thoughts Thursday morning.

Wednesday, July 30
I am listening to my wife and my daughter describe leg shaving techniques. This is a clear sign we have spent too much time in too close proximately to each other.

We have moved today to a new flat. You have read in our previous blogs about the previous flat and seen the pictures we have posted. We grew to like the flat, cluttered as it was. The beds were still uncomfortable, but we have been toughened by our stay (although Wendy still has dreams of a comfortable mattress).

The driving force in our move was the distance to the orphanage. The previous flat was about 2 miles from the orphanage. We could have walked, but would have spent 40 minutes each way. In order to visit Kolya twice a day, that would mean 3 hours walking a day. We barely have enough energy to keep up with Kolya as it is. That would kill us. The other alternative would be to continue using our driver. But that costs 70 grivnas an hour. That is about $15 an hour. We basically pay that from the time we are picked up in the morning until the time we are dropped off in the evening.

The new flat is only a 5 minute walk to the orphanage; 10 minutes if the traffic is heavy; an hour if one of us is hit by a Ukrainian driver (by the way, we have discovered that the Ukrainian driver is awarded 50 points for every foreigner they hit, but only 10 points if they hit a fellow Ukrainian). The new flat is very nice inside (and Wendy’s dreams of a comfortable mattress have been met). We first met the owner several days ago and she told us we were the first Americans she had ever met. She is a very lively, fun lady who loves to travel and take long walks in the rain. If anyone knows of an available man, let us know.

Before we left the old flat, though, we had one of life’s classic moments. The owner of the flat had told our translator, Edward, that he wanted 15 minutes of our time before we left the flat to show us Ukrainian hospitality. We packed up in the morning, then visited Kolya until noon. We came back to the flat and waited for our host, joined by the other couple here in Mariupol, Joyce and Dan. He arrived with his 19 year old daughter (loyal readers should note that this is not the daughter he promised to Graham, this one was going to University to become a lawyer).
Before I continue, let me set the scene a bit. Alexander, the owner, is a successful businessman in Mariupol. He has 4 flats in the town. He does not speak English, although he will ask our translator for the English version of a word or two like wife or daughter and pronounce it with pride. And he loves to talk. Fortunately, we had an interpreter.

When Alexander arrived, he did not come empty handed. He arrived with a bottle of cognac and chocolates to share with us. He then bade us all to sit in the living room and proceeded to fill 5 small metal cups with cognac (one for Joe, Wendy, Dan, Edward, and the owner; Joyce does not drink – she is a good girl). He said none for Graham and Elizabeth because they were too young. But he did ask us if it was okay if they had some of his homemade currant wine. We said they could have a little. So he told his daughter to fetch the wine. His daughter disappeared to rummage in a closet we had been scared to open while we were there. She returned with a 5 gallon jug filled to the brim with a thick black liquid. She took it into the kitchen and came back into the living room with a small pitcher of the wine. Alexander then poured a small amount of the wine into 4 of the glasses (one for Graham, Elizabeth, his daughter, and Joyce; so much for being a good girl).

Once the glasses were filled, Alexander then rose to his feet and proposed a toast to us, for the noble thing we were doing in opening our homes and hearts and adopting children from the Ukraine. He also mentioned during the toast that if we had any problems to let him know and they would be … resolved (hmmmm). He also made the offer to Dan and I to join his agricultural import/export business (double hmmmm). After the translation, we clinked our cups and threw down our cognacs. Elizabeth and Alexander’s daughter sipped their glasses of wine, Joyce pretended to sip hers (back to a good girl), and Graham drained his glass (uh, oh).
Alexander then filled our cups with another round of cognac. Graham did not get another round of wine. Joe then rose and toasted the relationship between the United States and Ukraine. We then clinked glasses and drank again.

Then Alexander told us that in Ukrainian tradition, because of the Trinity, you must toast in 3s. So he filled our glasses again (poor Graham, he still had to sit there with an empty glass). Then he rose again and told us that what was his car was our car, his house was our house, his wife was our sister (a Ukrainian joke, feel free to use it at your own toasts). Then we clinked glasses and drank again. After each toast, Alexander would pass around chocolate.
Then he told us of one more Ukrainian tradition which our translator had some difficulty with until Joe recognized what he was trying to say: “one for the road.” Alexander then filled the cups again, this time to brim, effectively emptying the bottle. Joe then rose to his feet and toasted the friendship between our two families and inviting Alexander and his family to come over to Colorado and stay in our condo (much to Wendy’s dismay). In a further show of hospitality, Alexander offered this daughter to Graham, who was now wondering if there were no polygamy laws in the Ukraine. We clinked glasses for the final time and downed what was left of the cognac.
After many handshakes, hugs, photographs, and our own personal jars of homemade currant wine (quite tasty actually, although we are marking the levels to keep Graham honest), we said our farewells to Alexander and his daughter. Graham thinks if he does marry into this family, he will be “connected” as well, just like his father-in-law, if you know what we mean.

After dropping off our bags at the new flat, we still had time before we would be able to see Kolya again, so we went to a restaurant called Dominos. They normally cater to a dinner crowd, but they were open so we went inside. Our first impression was that it would be too expensive, but Edward looked at the menu and found that the prices were reasonable. So we decided to eat there. Joyce and Dan were with us, so the ordering process took quite a bit of time with Edward translating what was on the menu for each of us. The waitress was very patient, helped no doubt by the fact that we were the only ones in the place. After taking our orders and delivering our drinks, the waitress went into the back. We chatted at the able, Joyce being a second Mom to Graham because at 17, he needs several to keep him line. While we were chatting, Joyce noticed a bell shaped object on our table with a button on top. Absently, she tapped her hand on the button as she talked. Then she noticed a noise towards the back of the room every time she tapped. She looked up to see the waitress heading for our table. Quickly, calmly, coolly, Joyce waved her arms while mouthing “No, no, no.” Everyone at the table broke up laughing. Dan discreetly moved the buzzer farm from Joyce’s reach.

The meal was very good. Evidence of that was Graham finished a good portion of his lamb dish. Joe signaled for the check which he and Dan would split. Instead of the check, the waitress brought over a small tray and cup. Edward, translating, explained that the guest would roll two dice and the outcome of the roll would determine the discount applied to the bill. Joe felt lucky so he grabbed the cup, blew on it, shook it up, and rolled a 10. Not a bad discount. Time was running short, so although Joe wanted to stop at the slot machines, we needed to get to the orphanage to see Kolya.

Apparently, the kids have returned to the summer camp. Monday and Tuesday, the kids poured out of the orphanage when we were there visiting. But today, we were joined only by an Italian couple adopting a sibling pair. We had pulled a soccer ball and Frisbee out of the donations when we first arrived, and that has been a large part of what we have done with Kolya during our time together. We will have kick-arounds, or sometimes small matches with the ball. Or we will pull out the Frisbee and Wendy and Joe will relive their college days (at least Joe will, Wendy says she was too busy “studying”).

While the kids were visiting Colorado, Joe started teaching Kolya to juggle. When he left, Kolya had the rudiments down, but had not yet progressed to a 3 ball juggle. The first day we visited with Kolya, he found 3 small rocks and showed us that he could now juggle. The next day, we brought 3 balls and Joe and Kolya have also spent time juggling. We have also determined that Kolya has a heck of an arm and we figure he can make the throw from left field to nail the runner at home without a problem.

Wendy would like to clarify the apartment renting concept for those of you who think we are renting “rental properties.” Oh no. Mariupol has 6 hotels, 3 of which are nice as our driver explained to us. They are $200/night. Therefore, wise and savvy people who have family to bunk with advertise their apartments which are their actual homes. The majority of people here live in apartments. We have not seen many homes/houses. I think I have actually seen 3 total. They inhabit 1 to 2 bedroom apts with a dinky kitchen and a family area. You hang your clothes out on a line outside a window for everyone to enjoy. As we explained before, our first apt here was stuffed to the gills with “stuff.” Piles of clothing everywhere, not one inch was not covered. This new apt is owned by a single 59 y/o very clean, uncluttered lively woman. Yea! I love it because it is decorated in pale pinks and white. The curtains are beautiful lace. The coffee cups are petite and flowery. She removed all of her personal belongings cleaned out the fridge and moved in with someone else. We had mentioned to Edward that she did not own an oven as we found this curious. These people live as we did in our college dorms, with hot plates and plug in pitchers which heat their water. Edward and his wife also do not have an oven. When we arrived yesterday Edward pointed out that she bought us a microwave oven. OMG! I am embarrassed at the lengths these people will go to, to make us happy. We paid her $800 for 16-17 days rental or $50 per night. If it is true the average person in Mariupol makes $100/month, she just won the lottery with us. The one complaint Joe has (besides the all pervasive pink) is that she has a fuzzy cover on the toilet lid, and, guys, we know what that means….yep, you have to hold up the toilet seat.

Thursday, July 31

We are getting into a routine at the new apartment. Joe is up first and heats his water up in the microwave and then puts in a couple scoops of Nescafe. We have seen very few coffee makers in the Ukraine, none of the apartments we have been in had them. All of them do have these electric pitchers which allow you to heat up water (we haven't dared to use them though, years of use has produced quite a build-up). Instant coffee seems to be the order of the day. If you want espresso from a street side vendor, they just give you an extra heaping scoop of instant in a small amount of hot water. Yum! After Joe heats up his coffee, he sits at the kitchen table admiring the view of the Mariupol factories spewing a gray/white cloud into the air. The birds here are a hardy sort. If they fly through the cloud, they stagger a bit, then right themselves and fly on. Joe's normal vacation routine would involve buying a local paper and reading it while drinking his coffee and waiting for the family to wake. He tried that here, but after 30 minutes of staring at the page, he realized that reading Ukrainian (or Russian, whatever kind of paper he bought) was even harder than trying to speak it. So now he contents himself with trying to translate the ingredients on labels using our Russian-English dictionary.

Eventually, the rest of the family rises, one by one. We make some kilbossa and eggs for breakfast and then head over to the orphanage for our morning visit. The kids we saw and played with earlier in the week have all returned to camp, so it is just us along with an Italian couple who are adopting a sibling pair. The orphanage has a few cats, one in particular we have taken a liking to. Elizabeth has named it Precious. Because it only has one eye, the rest of us have taken to calling it The Dread Pirate Precious.

Between noon and 12:30, we have to leave. So we use that time to stop by the store, grab some lunch, and possibly some sleep (those of us who only slept 10 hours need to grab a couple more). About 3pm we head back over to see Kolya again. When we are with him, we generally play soccer or throw the frisbee. We have started pulling out the cards. Graham and Joe are trying to teach him how to play Texas Hold 'em. We are also exchanging card tricks. For an 11 year old, Kolya knows some good ones.

At about 5:15, we head back to the apartment. Thursday night, we pulled out a video of the Marx Brothers' A Night at the Opera. Joe and the kids love the movie; for Wendy it was her first time. She enjoyed it, helped along no doubt by the nips at the jar of the homemade wine.

It is now Friday midday. We had our morning visit with Kolya and are are blogging at lunch.

We do not have any specific plans for the weekend. We can only visit Kolya once a day on Saturday and Sunday.

Monday is the court date. We are waiting anxiously for that day. Time to close. The hour is up at the internet club. We hope everyone in readerland is well. And thanks for the update on the cats.